Comments on: We Had Been Pregnant

By: Stephen

Stephen — Mon, 01 Jun 2009 21:32:10 +0000

Thanks, Josh.

By: Josh

Josh — Mon, 01 Jun 2009 17:14:19 +0000

Stephen,
I just happened upon this, and it might be the most honest depiction of the exhilaration and fear connected with becoming a parentthat I’ve ever read. I’m glad I found this blog, and I’m glad that a man, a family, as gifted as yours has chosen to share it with the rest of us. I knew you were an intelligent and talented person, but I never realized the full extent of it. Thanks for this and for sharing.

God bless you, man.

By: Laurs

Laurs — Fri, 22 May 2009 16:56:12 +0000

Thanks Stephen, I got your blog off Geof’s link on his blog this morning.
You’re a great story-teller.. and thanks for sharing.

By: Stephen

Stephen — Thu, 21 May 2009 18:18:55 +0000

The date on the post is accurate: I wrote it back then, though I did minor clean-up on it when I put it on the blog.

By: Geof F. Morris

Geof F. Morris — Thu, 21 May 2009 18:07:42 +0000

Thanks for sharing, Stephen. Did you write this back then, or did you just back-date it appropriately?

By: Stephen

Stephen — Thu, 21 May 2009 17:46:14 +0000

Thanks, guys, for your support and thoughts. After we experienced this so long ago, I found that talking about it led to others talking about it as well. Shared pain is often lessened pain.

By: Renee

Renee — Thu, 21 May 2009 16:47:10 +0000

Hey, this is Renee, Alex’s wife. I’ve been lurking for a while around here, but post has made me come out of the woodwork.

We had a miscarriage in December. I had made it to 3 months with no problems and then it all just fell apart. I was completely distraught for weeks. Recently, when I saw a girlfriend of mine who is now pregnant, with her beautiful tummy, all those memories were brought to the surface again. We had chosen two possible names, and I had even bought a little giraffe to be his/her first toy.

The pain of loss has definitely diminished over the course of the year, and I can usually use logic and science to calm myself down. I try to tell myself that it was a dud egg, and it wouldn’t have been able to become a baby, that’s why nature took over, but it still hurts. Just having had the CHANCE at having a second little bundle of awesomeness and then having it taken away, ya know? But now I just concentrate on our son and I am eternally grateful for him.

And on a lighter note: It sure is fun trying again!

By: Dana

Dana — Thu, 21 May 2009 16:03:15 +0000

I’ll admit it – this made me cry as I felt your joy and your pain. If the whole “rocket scientist” thing doesn’t work out you could definitely be a writer because you can draw your audience into your world and enable them to experience the situation with you.
You never get over this type of loss. You’ll always mark the days, the years, and what would have been the special events – especially as you experience them with your other children. A part of you will look at your family and realize that what is three should be four; what is now four should be five.
My heart goes out to you and Misty.

By: Asai

Asai — Thu, 21 May 2009 15:54:31 +0000

*hugs*