Monthly Archives: January 2006

Room of Toddler Horrors

Yesterday was one of those days that make the militantly child-free chortle with glee. Misty & I kept the nursery at church, a task we’re given once a month as sort of a kid tax for having childcare during the service the rest of the time. That and I haven’t damaged any of the kids […]

Apartheid Activist Gets His Due

Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star
As Sung by Elijah Granade

Biko biko biko star
How wonder what-a are
Up above world sss high
Like ….
BIKO biko biko star
How wonder what-a are

Worrying About Punishment

Now that Eli is old enough to know that he’s doing things he shouldn’t do, we’re starting to wrestle with how to punish him and how to redirect his behavior. It’s something of a nervous tightrope act, only your hair is on fire at the time and the audience is throwing knives at you.

Sharp knives.

We’re […]


Eli is moving to the stage where he does things he should not do while looking sidelong at us, making sure we’re watching him do the things he should not do. This in turn has led to the need for punishment. We’re trying to redirect him as much as possible (“Eli, why don’t you take […]


Evolution of the word “Yes”

By Elijah Granade, Aged 23 months

1. “Uhhh!” Accompanied by urgent pointing and repetition of “uhhh!” Can be used to indicate “yes”, “I want that”, or “that way”.

2. “I do!” Pronounced “I daow!” This one showed up when he was around 14 months or so. Usage: “Are you hungry? Do you want […]

Welcome Back

Hi, this is Eli’s dad. I’ll shout over the sound of the fourth wall crashing down around me.

I haven’t written in this journal for a couple of months. Once Eli began talking and expressing himself, I felt strange putting words in his mouth the way I had been doing. In addition, work had become crazy […]