How We Wake Up These Days

Left to our own devices, Misty and I tend to sleep late. Even after having Eli and Liza — and isn’t that a lovely phrase, “having Eli and Liza”? As if we invited them over for dinner one night and they never left — we still occasionally got to sleep until 7 or 7:30.

That’s all over now. Eli gets up with the sun, often at 5:45, or as I call it, “oh, c’mon, kid, we stayed up late watching episodes of Angel”. As soon as he’s up he wanders in and starts talking to Misty.

Even if we could convince him to stay in his room and play without coming and telling us that he’s going to stay in his room and play, we’d be foiled by his colon. Eli has taken to pooping every morning at 6:15. It’s like he’s only eating a mix of beans and bran cereal topped with Metamucil, when in fact he’s only devouring crackers and our patience. So every morning at 6:15 I get to wake up and help him.

Even that wouldn’t be so bad if we could keep him quiet. Liza often wakes up around 6:30, but if undisturbed will go back to sleep for a while. This morning, I heard Eli’s high, piping voice as he excitedly told Misty about Zack and Wiki or Word Girl. Over the monitor, I could hear Liza stirring. Please go back to sleep, I thought. Please go back to sleep.

Then Liza said, loudly and clearly, “hewwoooo!”

Hey, friends who aren’t parents, don’t you want to have kids now? I have two I could loan you.

7 thoughts on “How We Wake Up These Days

  1. Hey, I’m awake at that hour most of the time these days.

    This is not, however, an offer to come over and wipe Eli’s butt, standing or special.

  2. LOL!
    I have the polite excuse of living a quarter of a continent away, but if I didn’t I’d gladly take ’em for a weekend, knowing, of course, that I get to give them back! 😉 The cute factor (and the light at the end of the tunnel) should bloster me for 48 hours!

  3. I’ve been unsuccessfully attempting the loan process for going on 8 years now. Right after cute wore out on my first model. He was the up with the sun type too. So I tried model number 2, but it was defective. He had acid reflux, so we had screaming at night for hours on end topped with an up with the sun older model. Model number 3 is the perfect fit. Stays up late with us, sleeps late in the morning. Only one small flaw…he prefers to sleep in the king size between his daddy and I and he flops like a fish… Still working on the loan…given up the search for the perfect kid….lol

  4. People sometimes ask eunice and I: “But don’t you want to have children?”

    I need to bookmark this page in my ever-growing list of reasons to say “HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH, no” when asked that.

    I’ve reconciled my parents to the fact that my elder brother or my younger brother can produce children, if they so choose. But I am completely out of that race. 🙂

  5. It doesn’t get any better. Youngest is 7, and of a Saturday morning he’s up before his brothers and gently rapping, rapping at our chamber door at lo about 6:00, asking if he can play on the computer or have a popsicle. (Seriously.)

    But at least he can use the bathroom by himself these days. Thank God for small favors.

    I’ve tried to sell mine to the gypsies a time or two. Let me know how it works for you.

    And we’re having another. We’re nuts.

  6. Hey, just imagine lots of little Seths running around and debating which Linux distro is the one true one.

    What am I saying: your kids would run Windows.

  7. Sean is desperately praying that by my coming and helping out for a week that will permanently cure me of any desire to have children. I’m still not sure, but the more I read, the more I’m starting to think maybe this will be great birth control.

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