{"id":280,"date":"2006-04-22T16:45:02","date_gmt":"2006-04-22T21:45:02","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/granades.com\/2006\/04\/22\/itd-be-easier-if-he-had-garanimals\/"},"modified":"2006-04-22T16:45:02","modified_gmt":"2006-04-22T21:45:02","slug":"itd-be-easier-if-he-had-garanimals","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/granades.com\/?p=280","title":{"rendered":"It&#8217;d Be Easier If He Had Garanimals"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>This morning Misty slept in, leaving me in charge of Eli. At some point we had been up long enough that even I realized it was time for Eli to change out of his dinosaur pyjamas and into something more suited for the daytime, like his dinosaur shirt. &#8220;Let&#8217;s go change!&#8221; I told him.<\/p>\n<p>When I opened his closet, Eli said, &#8220;I wanna blue shirt.&#8221; I pulled out his blue <a href=\"http:\/\/www.whoi.edu\/\">WHOI shirt<\/a>, a perennial favorite. &#8220;No, I wanna <i>blue<\/i> shirt.&#8221; I pulled out the next blue shirt. &#8220;No, daddy, I wanna <i>blue shirt<\/i>.&#8221; It was like playing a <a href=\"http:\/\/brasslantern.org\/\">text adventure with bad disambiguation<\/a>. &#8220;Which shirt do you want?&#8221; I asked Eli. &#8220;The blue shirt, the blue shirt, the blue shirt, or the blue shirt?&#8221; I finally found the exact blue shirt he wanted: the one with lizards and frogs on it. I added a dark brown pair of shorts and voil&agrave;! A perfect summer ensemble.<\/p>\n<p>Eli went to play in the living room while I went in the kitchen to empty the dishwasher. A few minutes later I heard an anguished cry. &#8220;Daddy, my pants!&#8221; I ran back to the living room. His brown shorts were standing up on their own, completely toddler-free. My pantsless son sat behind them, staring, sad trembly lip in full force.<\/p>\n<p>The good news is that, since we live in Alabama, it&#8217;s okay if he runs around in only a diaper.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>This morning Misty slept in, leaving me in charge of Eli. At some point we had been up long enough that even I realized it was time for Eli to change out of his dinosaur pyjamas and into something more suited for the daytime, like his dinosaur shirt. &#8220;Let&#8217;s go change!&#8221; I told him. When &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/granades.com\/?p=280\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">It&#8217;d Be Easier If He Had Garanimals<\/span> <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-280","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/granades.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/280","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/granades.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/granades.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/granades.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/granades.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=280"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/granades.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/280\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/granades.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=280"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/granades.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=280"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/granades.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=280"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}