{"id":2959,"date":"2009-06-04T12:57:22","date_gmt":"2009-06-04T17:57:22","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/granades.com\/?p=2959"},"modified":"2009-06-04T13:05:59","modified_gmt":"2009-06-04T18:05:59","slug":"kids-and-cages-go-together-like-apples-and-razor-blades","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/granades.com\/?p=2959","title":{"rendered":"Kids and Cages Go Together Like Apples and Razor Blades"},"content":{"rendered":"

Several years ago, Eli climbed into a dog cage, so of course we took a picture<\/a>. Ten months later we got hate mail about it<\/a>.<\/p>\n

A few months ago, comic book writer Matt Fraction took a picture of his kid in a dog crate<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Because my mind works lighting fast, yesterday I thought, “I wonder how many pictures of kids in dog crates I can find.”<\/p>\n

The answer? Lots<\/a> and lots<\/a> and lots<\/a> and even more lots<\/a>. Enough lots for thousands of pillars of salt.<\/p>\n

\"One<\/a><\/div>\n

One kid in a dog cage!<\/p>\n

\"Two<\/a><\/div>\n

TWO kids in a dog cage!<\/p>\n

\"Three<\/a><\/div>\n

THREE<\/b> kids in a dog cage!<\/p>\n

\"Four<\/a><\/div>\n

FOUR KIDS IN A CAGE!<\/b><\/p>\n

\"Danger:<\/a><\/div>\n

Sometimes the kids are dangerous.<\/p>\n

\"Two<\/a><\/div>\n

Sometimes they are cloned.<\/p>\n

I feel like I have stumbled into a subculture I never knew existed, like finding out that people write WOPR\/KITT slashfic. I think I’m going to declare this a new movement, write a book, and get on Oprah. Clearly it’s time parents stopped claiming that their kids aren’t like pets at all.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Several years ago, Eli climbed into a dog cage, so of course we took a picture. Ten months later we got hate mail about it. A few months ago, comic book writer Matt Fraction took a picture of his kid in a dog crate. Because my mind works lighting fast, yesterday I thought, “I wonder … Continue reading Kids and Cages Go Together Like Apples and Razor Blades<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2959","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry"],"aioseo_notices":[],"aioseo_head":"\n\t\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t