{"id":323,"date":"2006-06-10T13:53:30","date_gmt":"2006-06-10T18:53:30","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/granades.com\/2006\/06\/10\/overeducated\/"},"modified":"2006-06-10T13:53:30","modified_gmt":"2006-06-10T18:53:30","slug":"overeducated","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/granades.com\/?p=323","title":{"rendered":"Overeducated"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Eli&#8217;s steady diet of educational TV shows and our questions (&#8220;What color is this, Eli? What shape is this?&#8221;) has had unintended consequences. He now identifies and classifies non-stop, repeating things he learned from Sesame Street and Blue&#8217;s Clues.<\/p>\n<p>We wanted him to be smart, where by &#8220;smart&#8221; we mean &#8220;able to perform cute tricks on command,&#8221; but my goodness, it never ends. He is a sponge, a self-squeezing sponge that absorbs knowledge and then dribbles it out everywhere later, and that is a metaphor that I&#8217;m going to pretend I didn&#8217;t make. I was dressing this morning when Eli pointed off to my right. &#8220;An X! Look, an X!&#8221; I looked where he was pointing, but didn&#8217;t see anything. &#8220;Over there! An X!&#8221; he said, now pointing to the left. I couldn&#8217;t see it. &#8220;Where&#8217;s the X?&#8221; I asked Eli. &#8220;THERE! Right there!&#8221; he said, now pointing at me. That&#8217;s when I realized that I was wearing an old Mac OS X t-shirt with a big furry X on the back, and he&#8217;d been seeing it when I turned around.<\/p>\n<p>This also identifies me as a big geek, but you&#8217;ve probably gathered that by now.<\/p>\n<p>It&#8217;s been like that all day. When he woke up from his nap all hoarse and sweaty like he&#8217;d just come back from yelling at a basketball game, he stumbled over to my laptop. &#8220;Look! An L. And an X. There&#8217;s a rectangle and a rectangle. Two rectangles! And a vent and anoner one and anoner one and anoner one and four vents! There&#8217;s a circle! I go to the other side of dad&#8217;s computer. There&#8217;s a circle! And here&#8217;s another one on this backpack!&#8221; When Misty called a while later, Eli said, &#8220;Dad is talking on the <i>telefono<\/i>. Telefono is Spanish for telephone.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>What will he be like when he&#8217;s an adult with a job? &#8220;Here is the TPS report, and another, and another. Three TPS reports! This is a summons to see human resources! This is the office for the head of HR! The door is a rectangle. This slip of paper is a pink! And a rectangle!&#8221; There&#8217;s only one thing to do. This afternoon we are starting him on a regimen of NASCAR and American Idol reruns. I hope he doesn&#8217;t root for Kellie Pickler.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Eli&#8217;s steady diet of educational TV shows and our questions (&#8220;What color is this, Eli? What shape is this?&#8221;) has had unintended consequences. He now identifies and classifies non-stop, repeating things he learned from Sesame Street and Blue&#8217;s Clues&#8230;.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-323","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/granades.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/323","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/granades.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/granades.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/granades.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/granades.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=323"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/granades.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/323\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/granades.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=323"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/granades.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=323"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/granades.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=323"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}