The Evolution of Cute

Originally, children were not cute. It’s not that they were ugly; it’s that they lacked a certain something that made them cute. This resulted in a lot of attrition: when the children would cry or destroy things or in general be unappealing, parents couldn’t say, “Oh, but isn’t he cute when he’s nice?” Instead they’d leave the kids by the side of the road.

Then, eureka! A child was born who was amazingly cute. Imagine the advantage this gave her in survival! Even more amazing, when she grew up and had children of her own, those children were cute. Soon the cute gene ruled supreme, with parents everywhere accosting strangers and demanding that they admire the cuteness of their child.

4 Comments

  1. anonymous
    on January 24, 2006 at 3:19 pm | Permalink

    SO. TRUE.

  2. on January 24, 2006 at 3:28 pm | Permalink

    The CUTE and LOUD genes and infanticide through the ages.

  3. on January 24, 2006 at 11:50 pm | Permalink

    i’ve had thoughts along these lines too.

    could it be instead that babies have always looked the way they have, and human aesthetics/emotions evolved to make us find babies cute? do adult dogs view puppies as adorable? or is that just a human response to ?

    in any case, i have to think that flirting behavior by babies did evolve the way you describe it.

  4. on January 25, 2006 at 7:55 am | Permalink

    It certainly could be that we adapted to them, but I think the above makes for a funnier story.

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