Future So Bright, I Gotta Be Gay

Focus on the Family, James Dobson’s conservative evangelical Christian group, is dabbling in near-future science fiction. They’ve sent out a letter from 2012, four years after Obama becomes President. They have looked into the future, and it’s gays as far as their eyes can see. Same-sex marriage, first graders forced to learn about homosexuality, churches required to marry gays, the Boy Scouts disbanding rather than let gays be Scoutmasters, and special bonuses for gays who enlist in the military. Also, just so you know, in the grim future of 2012, it’s “almost impossible to keep children from seeing pornography”.

All Focus on the Family can see is sex, Sex, SEX! Everywhere! Mostly gay sex! Why, if Obama wins, someone may kick down my front door and force Misty and me to divorce so that we can enter into gay marriage. I guess I’d better start looking for an Adam to my Steve.

The bonus on gays in the military is a nice touch. What does Focus on the Family think, is going to happen? Pink beret groups who have fabulous fighting skills and well-tailored camo? Come to think of it, that’s probably who’s going to bust into my house.

Yes, science fiction can be viewed as fantasies of political agency. I know writing near-future SF can be hard, especially if all you do is inflate your bĂȘte noire to comical proportions. But really, Focus on the Family? Your effort is the kind of sweaty paranoid fantasy I’d expect to see self-published on Lulu.com and with a bad Poser-rendered cover.

11 Comments

  1. jess
    on October 29, 2008 at 10:47 pm | Permalink

    My brain officially hurts now. Although I should have taken the advice of my friend to whom I copied this link: “Too lame; didn’t read.”

  2. Seth Vidal
    on October 30, 2008 at 8:41 am | Permalink

    This blog post is Fabulous, too. Hey, didn’t you work with a guy named Adam at Duke?

  3. Jaime
    on October 30, 2008 at 10:12 am | Permalink

    Ahh, Steven :) You are so hilariously inappropriate… I really appreciate that you tried to match the inappropriateness level of the 2012 futuristic letter. It was a valiant effort, but I think that letter still wins. {sigh} I read it yesterday and shook my head. Matt sent me a response letter from 2016 that someone posted on their blog here: http://stillsearching.wordpress.com/2008/10/28/letter-from-2016-in-obamas-america/. Also hilarious.

  4. on October 30, 2008 at 11:06 am | Permalink

    Seth, the more I think about it, the more Adams I realize I know. Goodness, how was I blind to this possibility for so long?

    Jamie, I liked the “Mao-rocks-my-face-off act” in your link.

  5. on October 30, 2008 at 6:46 pm | Permalink

    Now I’m pondering a name change … ;)

  6. on October 30, 2008 at 7:19 pm | Permalink

    So what’s the real message here? People who oppose the Obama presidency are homophobic religious whack jobs?

    I live in California. I will be voting for McCain and against Proposition 8. What does that make me?

    Incidentally, I loved your LOL Trek from last year. I just disagree with you on some issues.

  7. on October 30, 2008 at 10:10 pm | Permalink

    Golem,
    Don’t you think that’s a bit of a leap? Stephen’s remarks were directed quite explicitly at their sorely deserved target: Focus on the Family. I don’t follow how that equates to an opinion that all people opposed to an Obama presidency are “homophobic religious whackjobs.” I won’t profess to know the “true message” of Stephen’s post, but I know him well enough to know it’s not that. I promise you that no thoughtful and reasonable person has any reason to feel “convicted” by Stephen’s remarks.

  8. Kismet
    on October 31, 2008 at 8:29 am | Permalink

    Okay so I want to know, when did saying something against one person who supports McCain equate to a slander against McCain himself? Is there some connection to things I am not aware of? I have seen a lot of it lately. Just curious.

  9. on November 1, 2008 at 5:16 pm | Permalink

    Golem, as Jeff suggested, you’ve taken my post and read a tremendous amount into it. To be explicit, the Focus on the Family letter is profoundly stupid in many ways, starting with a misunderstanding of how fast the Supreme Court could effect change. The letter proclaims that their extrapolation is based on reasonable interpretation of what has already happened in the US, but notice how their footnotes vanish for the more lurid fantasies such as schools being forced to teach 1st graders about homosexuality, with no students being able to opt out. Their predictions don’t pass the laugh test.

    That’s the real message of this post, that Focus on the Family’s letter makes them sound like Focus on the Gays, and not that people who vote for McCain or against Obama are homophobic religious whack jobs.

  10. on November 1, 2008 at 6:46 pm | Permalink

    Stephen,

    I didn’t read the entire Focus on the Family letter. What little I read hurt my eyes. Yes, they are foolishly obsessed.

    Perhaps I did read too much into what you said. I’ll be glad when the election is over.

  11. Jaime
    on November 1, 2008 at 10:44 pm | Permalink

    This response blog by Jim Wallis was excellent, in case anyone needs something they can actually take seriously: http://www.sojo.net/blog/godspolitics/?p=3283

One Trackback

  1. By GFMorris.com » links for 2008-10-30 on October 30, 2008 at 9:30 pm

    [...] Future So Bright, I Gotta Be Gay | Live Granades (tags: gfmorris_comment) [...]

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