This is what we do after Stephen cleans the bathroom!

Stephen didn’t post it last night but we put new photos at the top. Clear your cache to see the new photo glory!

Before I had a kid, I thought parents who got sick from their small children were stupid.

I mean how hard is it to freaking wash your hands after you deal with your kid? (I’m pretty sure that this sentence should come with a laugh track.)

What I didn’t know was the intimacy and frequency with which you deal with your child. Between the never ending nose wipes, changing diapers and clothes, and eating; the primary care-giver, unless he or she is unusually resistant to cold germs, is going to get sick. Also, the level at which you are smug about not catching said cold germ also greatly affects the probability that you will catch it 24 hours after your kid is well.

That was me this weekend. Eli was sick. We realized it as soon as he got up Saturday morning. We had the discussion over breakfast that we shouldn’t be going to church on Sunday because he’d just infect everyone else. Luckily, it wasn’t a long-lasting cold. By Monday morning, he seemed to have made a decent recovery, so we ran some errands. I congratulated myself on not contracting this particular cold germ because I seem to have caught every other one Eli had this past winter or if not every other one, then at least two out of three.

Last night before I went to bed I felt the scratchy throat. I popped an airborne. This morning I had odd fever dreams about paying taxes on my car in Arkansas but without any checks in my check book and about Stephen catching a rattlesnake with his bare hands. At breakfast, I took another airborne. I may have to run out to the store sometime today for more airborne cause I’m pretty sure I’m going to take all I have today to ward off this crud.

I guess the moral of this story is never make fun of the common cold because it knows where you live. Ok, maybe that’s not actually the moral but somehow that’s funnier to me right now than laughing at myself for being stupid.

Eli has reached the stage where he is teaching himself through imitation. Tonight the two of us were in his room, under the black blanket that he always sleeps with. This blanket has stars, planets, and the occasional alien on it. He demands that we go under the blanket and look at the night sky, light filtering dimly through the colorful parts of the blanket.

After a minute of that, he wriggled out from under the cover. He went into my nighttime routine with him: he started patting my blanket-covered form and whisper-singing “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.” Then he leaned down to kiss me through the blanket. “See you inna A.M.,” just like I tell him.

He’s lately begun whispering to me after that, though: “Come back, daddy, come back!” So I stuck my head out from under the covers and whispered that to him. “No, I see you inna A.M.,” he told me firmly and left his room.

He’s also teaching himself by asking questions. No, that’s not exactly true: he is teaching himself by demanding that we do things. Near the end of bath tonight he was fingering his chest. “Finding your nipples?” I asked him.

“Yep.” Eli turned to Misty, earnest and concerned. “Mommy? You show me your nipples?”

“No,” Misty said, “men can show their nipples when they want to but women can’t.”

“Say ‘gender inequality,’ Eli!” I told him. He didn’t reply. He must be preparing for his coming role in the hegemonic patriarchy.

For some reason I woke up this morning and said to myself, “Bookmarks! Yeah! That’s what I’ll make today!” So here’s what I made:

Eli caught a cold sometime the end of last week and was sniffly and pitiful all weekend. So this is what this weekend looked like:

with a side of this:

Today has been non-stop whine all day long. School starts one week from tomorrow. How many hours is it from now till then?

My friend Dan Schmidt mentioned the Random Baby Namer at Pregnancy Today. Oh my goodness. The names it comes up with are terrible, especially the male ones. Crigger? Lightsey? Butts? You might as well hang a sign around their necks saying, “Taunt me please.”

We have reached the next stage of toddler evolution. Forget opening doors — now he can open the drawers and doors that have the kid-locks on them. He pulls them a little ways out, depresses the lock, and bing he’s into the knives or medicine or flamethrowers. And those toddler-proof doorknob covers? Those worked for all of three days.

This afternoon he crawled up onto Misty’s chair in front of her computer. “I play Cookie game!” He then proceeded to play the games by himself. He was a little slow on the mouse, but at the rate he’s learning I expect him to spank me at deathmatches in a week.

This whole opening a store thing has really caught on among the locals. Here’s who you might meet working the counter if you desire anything crafty, electronic, musical, or coffee-based.

Ashley and I will be minding the cross-stitch wing. We love the special complicated pieces. Bring on the bead work!

Jessica and Ronnie will be handling the yarn wing. Jessica free forms interesting useful pieces and Ronnie can turn out the baby hats like a sweat-shop factory.

Ronnie and Kat will be working the quilting wing. Both traditional and modern aesthetics welcome.

All the husbands will be rotating through electronics and here’s the “bestest” part — they actually know what they are talking about when you ask them if the monster amp you want to buy goes to 11 or not. Some of them will even be able to tell you the mechanics behind it. Oh, who am I kidding they’ll all be able to tell you the mechanics behind it and so will some of the women.

Geof and Jason, who was volunteered in absentia, will be tending bar upstairs. Geof will also be booking the coolio musicians for evening performances so if you have a decent act, get in touch with him (Depressing Chicks with guitars get preferential treatment). Jason will be tending both the coffee bar as well as the liquor bar. Be sure to ask for his special.

What started out as a way for us gals to have a bit of extra income and be able to (at the same time) rear our kids ourselves has morphed into a scary, scary Hobby Lobby, Best Buy, coffee shop, bar hybrid. Be afraid, be very afraid.

OK Go: Here It Goes Again (2006)

Their video for “A Million Ways”, a marvelous example of a low-budget DIY aesthetic, was a minor hit on the Internet back in 2005. The “Here It Goes Again” video is just as catchy. It’s Jamiroquai done with treadmills. Watch for the skating effect, easily the highlight of the video.

Jamiroquai: Virtual Insanity (1996)

Since I’m on a rock-band-gliding-around kick, here’s the Jamiroquai video I referenced earlier. It’s cool and slick and high-budget, but they clearly didn’t do it in a single take like OK Go did.